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This is a novel in Chinese whose writing began on the night of June 4th, 1989, in Shanghai, and was published underground in Beijing in late 1999 after numerous rejections in the Chinese-speaking world, now self-translated into English. Will put it out paragraph by paragraph in instalments from today onwards, 12/10/2022：

I’m only twenty-one years old. The world has lost all its meaning to me. I’m not only disappointed and angry with it but also hate it. I have only one wish now: to kill myself. I cannot destroy the whole world, and the world can easily strangle me to death: each person can drown me with just one spit. Instead of being choked to death by the stinky farts of the masses and drenched in their dirty urine, it is better to end my own life as soon as possible, thereby declaring the end of the world with the end of myself.